By Daniel Bobinski
In the world of business, professional know-how usually gets all the glory. But since 80 percent of promotions occur because of people skills, isn’t it time emotional intelligence (EQ) gets more attention? You can think of EQ as the secret sauce, because in a worldwide study of 200 companies, two-thirds of the difference between average and top performers was found to be EQ.
There’s a difference between IQ and EQ. Your baseline IQ (intelligence quotient) is largely influenced by genetics, and remains stable over time. However, because EQ is totally learnable, raising one’s EQ is something anyone can do.
With that, I’d like to explore two key aspects of EQ: self-awareness and relationship management.
Self-Awareness
Think of self-awareness as your personal GPS, but instead of navigating around road closures or traffic jams, it takes you to understanding the real you. When you understand your behavioral tendencies, your natural cognitive style, and both your learned and innate motivators, you can manage yourself like a seasoned pro.
Imagine you’ve got a deadline looming and anxiety starts creeping in. If you’re not aware of your tendencies, it’s common to default to being reactive. You may get snippy, or you may totally shut down, depending on your style. One person I know takes on the persona of a caffeinated squirrel. In each case, those behaviors can easily create distance between you and your coworkers and create a wall of resentment.
People who are self-aware are quicker to acknowledge the stress of a deadline and shift gears. Maybe they’ll take some purposeful deep breaths and start triaging. Maybe they’ll delegate. Maybe they’ll inquire if they can adjust the deadline. Regardless of their choice, people who are more self-aware tend to have more self-control. The bonus? Their team members remain on their side.
Relationship Management
If self-awareness is the key to self-management, think of relationship management as the lubricating oil for effective teams. And it’s necessary because collaboration isn’t optional in today’s workplace; it’s necessary.
Empathy is the cornerstone here. Let’s say two of your team members are experiencing intense negotiations with increasing volume and neither is listening to the other. If you’re a team leader without good relationship management skills, you might say something like, “just knock it off and get the work done.” But if you’re practicing good EQ, you know people want to feel heard. Therefore, you’ll listen to both sides and acknowledge each person’s point of view. From there you can find a solution that addresses the underlying issues, and the result is a stronger team.
Whether it’s giving constructive feedback or dealing with difficult customers, having high EQ enables you to turn those interactions into opportunities for growth. Besides, you’re not just solving problems, you’re building trust and loyalty.
The ROI of EQ
The bottom line is that it pays to learn EQ. If you need more data to believe this, consider that a study conducted by TalentSmart found that 90% of top performers have high EQ. In other words, emotional intelligence skills makes you valuable; you can’t afford to ignore them.
