President Donald Trump is exercising his right to be wrong, so hilariously wrong that I must put aside the column I intended to write – which was about the benefits of working out in water – and instead discuss our president’s current understanding of how the human body operates.
The man who is president of the United States of America, when recently speaking to reporters on the record, said that he thinks the human body runs like a non-rechargeable battery. When you’re born, you have a finite amount of energy stored in your body, in your battery, and the quicker you use it up, the earlier you die.
I am not making this up. But he is. Perhaps a kinder way to put it is: Where in the world did Donald Trump get this idea? We don’t know. What we do know is this astonishing personal belief of our president is right up there with “The moon is made of green cheese” and “Wire coat hangers multiply on their own in dark closets.”
It is well-documented and never denied that Trump was quite the jock in college and played sports with enthusiasm, the way sports are meant to be played. I know baseball was one of his favorites, which may explain his extraordinary ability even now to pitch and strike out and constantly yell at the umpires. But I digress.
It wasn’t until after college that Trump’s “body as battery” theory sparked him into action. To promote his longevity, he gave up sports and workouts. To this day – when the value of exercise has been proven beyond a shadow of a shred of a scintilla of doubt – Trump is hoping to live longer by moving his body less.
Is this why instead of walking 700 yards to a photo shoot with six other world leaders at the Group of Seven Summit in Sicily he took a golf cart?
Indeed, the only sport President Trump allows his battery to play is golf, which, of all the sports, uses the least amount of energy (i.e., less than eating a double scoop of Chunky Monkey in a waffle cone) when you drive around the course in a golf cart, only swinging the club for an average of six minutes per 18 holes.
“He came to view playing sports as time wasted,” Michael Kranish and Marc Fisher report in their 2016 book, “Trump Revealed,” a marvelous reference for people like me, who truly, madly, deeply want to understand what makes our president tick.
Maybe you see your body the way Trump sees his, and if that’s true, I hope you can press “Restart” and come back soon for that column on swimming.
For the rest of us, let me close with a few basic truths about how the human body works that will, sadly, catapult you ahead of your president’s own understanding. (Though I’m sure he would love to be set straight, if only he could extend his battery life.)
- If you want to see your body as a battery, know that it is miraculously rechargeable. When you eat real food, you recharge it. When you breathe clean air and take in nature, you recharge it. When you cultivate a vital and close network of loving friends and family in your life, you recharge it. All of these things – and especially physical activity – promote longevity.
- Playing sports, being physical, moving your body in ways you enjoy: This is not a waste of time. It’s what time was made for. Physical movement – small and large, mind and body – energizes your body on a cellular level. It boosts your immune system; it helps prevent sickness and diseases of all sorts. It will not shorten your life, unless you have a tragic accident, which can happen. But that’s no reason to quit your tennis team or stop walking the dog.
- A sedentary lifestyle – complicated by a love of fake food, diet drinks, three to four hours of sleep a night and long periods of isolation and distrust – is not good for your health. The president may be getting a charge out of saying it is, but even according to his own wacky theory, that still won’t add a nanosecond to his life.
– Marilynn Preston is the author of Energy Express, America’s longest-running healthy lifestyle column. Her new book “All Is Well: The Art {and Science} of Personal Well-Being” is available now. Visit Creators Publishing at creators.com/books/all-is-well to learn more. For more on personal well-being, visit www.MarilynnPreston.com.
