In this second installment of our series on Stephen Covey’s “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”, we’re looking at the second habit, “Begin with the end in mind.” In simple terms, this habit could be restated as, “Identify where you want to end up before you start doing anything.” Even simpler, habit two is about goal setting, but there’s more to it than just that.
Fundamental to whatever we do is knowing why we’re doing it. So, to be successful in habit two, we must also understand our inner core and our personal motivations. In previous columns from this space I’ve written about the six areas of learned motivation. Those can be easily reviewed by visiting ortoday.com and reading my columns from April through September of 2020.
Learned motivators often intertwine with our inner-core drivers in life, what Covey calls our “center.” Covey suggests that to maintain integrity, we should be aware of our center. This is no small matter, because it’s from our center that we derive our sense of security and have a basis for guiding our decisions. Our centers also lead us to choose what knowledge we want to acquire, and also where we derive our sense of power.
Different centers identified by Covey include money, work, possessions, pleasure, friends, enemies, church, self, spouse and family. One can also be principle centered.
By way of example, I once had a client named Paul who used to be work centered. That meant Paul’s sense of security came from his job, and he made decisions based on how the outcome of those decisions affected his work. Paul often chose what to learn based on how it was going to help him at work, and his sense of power, or self-worth, came from being seen as someone who did his job well.
Several years before I met Paul, he’d gotten laid off, and when that happened Paul’s world fell apart. He didn’t know he was work-centered, and therefore he didn’t understand why he went into a deep depression after getting laid off. The truth is that any center other than “principles” can be taken away from you and devastate your life. Think of someone ripping out the center core of the earth. It would be cataclysmic.
Choosing to be principle centered not only creates more stability in life, it also enables us to have more integrity when setting and pursuing goals. That’s why Covey wants us to be aware of what drives us, and students of emotional intelligence will recognize that this aligns with the starting block of emotional intelligence, which is “self-awareness.” Habit two (Begin with the end in mind) also involves the second block of emotional intelligence, “self-management.”
In the next issue I will explore the nuts and bolts of goal setting along with some techniques for weekly planning. Between now and then, spend some time to re-familiarize yourself with your learned motivators. Also try to identify your center. The more self-aware you are in these areas, the easier it is to be better at self-management.
Daniel Bobinski, M.Ed. is a best-selling author and a popular speaker at conferences and retreats. For more than 30 years he’s been working with teams and individuals (1:1 coaching) to help them achieve excellence. He was also teaching Emotional Intelligence since before it was a thing. Reach him through his website at MyWorkplaceExcellence.com or call his office at 208-375-7606.
